To our beloved Sparky

So I started this as a post to what I would say about Sparky when he is gone. But after having typed it, it did help me. So I decided to post it before we put him down. So read along if you may. Its long I know but just amuse me and my silly doggy ways it won't be too much longer now.

I found some more oldies but goodies and will be posted in the coming weeks. Bear with me please.

1st Halloween dress-up! There's a treat I am baiting him with.


Ahhh the sweet terror of meeting Stormy the pig (mascot for the Carolina Hurricanes) NHL


one of my all-time favs


his favorite toy is "lucky" the tiger, so, I dressed him up as Raja the Tiger from Disney's Mulan


A big HUG... & he trying to squirm away. If he could be portrayed as a comic, his eyes would be bulging out of his sockets.


& at happier moments long gone now


this is a pitiful picture and you can readily see his anger and disgust! but its hilarious huh?? he had a hot spot that he just wouldn't stop attacking. VICIOUS!! For anyone that has known him that is the last word you would use to describe him =)~



We have decided it is time to say good bye to our beloved dog Sparky.

I had just finished dog sitting for Dunkin' my cousin's dog and I knew I needed a faithful doggy companion. I always wanted a dog. I had toyed with the idea of it before. I loved Dunkin' and of course I couldn't have him. So having dogsat, this just pushed me over the edge. At the time I was living in a little 1 bedroom apt in Somerville, NJ. This was my 1st apartment straight out of college (go Penn State!). An apartment that did not allow pets. I had gone back to Philly for the weekend as I normally did every weekend.

The very first thing that morning on a cold and rainy day, my mom & I first went to the Montgomery County SPCA, nothing. I needed a small dog. Then we went to the Philadelphia SPCA. I had lost the bid for a Yorkie named Oliver. Next runner up was a Beagle puppy, no other suitors either. She was almost mine! I was drumming up names, how'd I'd raise a puppy, thinking why is this little pup so whiny? The SPCA ladies seeing how unknowing I was in our furry 4-legged friends steered me to a more docile Cocker Spaniel, although he wasn't there for me to see. They found him in their system and saw he was currently being kept at the PetSmart location on Roosevelt Blvd. I imagined Dunkin' who is a Cock-a-Poo but looked more like a typical blonde Cocker Spaniel. In my mind I'd only seen blondes and rarely chocolates like Oprah. When they said he was black and white, I thought, I've never heard of such a thing!! My mom and I drove to go see him. Well and as they say, the rest is history.

I adopted him on Jan 3, 1999 he was 4 1/2 years old from the Philadelphia SPCA. That weekend I came home to that NJ apartment with a new side kick in tow. He came pre-named as "Sparky" and since he was already 4, I decided not to re-name him. It wasn't because I loved the name. In fact when I went to pick him up on his adoption day, I had forgotten his name. I asked the man, what was his name again "Spanky"?? Funny another dear cousin in Cali has a dog by that name. I had to pick him up later because his hair was so over grown you literally couldn't see his eyes, he could barely walk. The groomers had pitied him the day before and bathed him as best they could. He was obviously abused and very neglected.

I to this day do not know anything about his past. The day I brought him home, in jest my cousin (Dunkin's Dad) howled like a dog when they met and Sparky howled back in fear and shook like all his fur would fall off. After a few weeks a metal wire starting poking out and I discovered it was a long stitch from a wound on his muzzle. He had issues with men too.

I always wondered if he ever came across his previous owner(s) would he recognize them? I just feel lucky we found each other. Those SPCA ladies sure knew what they were doing. All for the adoption fee of $50.00 that included all his shots and a full-year of the SPCA's veterinary clinic care.

...Fast forward a few years...
He got so scared when the electricity went out he pulled up and ate the wall-to-wall very old and raggedy old shabby brown carpet, then, ate just the straw flowers mounted on wires but left the wires, thankfully. He tried to gnaw on a leather purse strap too but luckily his horrible teeth stopped him before he did too much damage. I was able to salvage that purse with help from a leather guy. I had to get him x-rays and fluids pumped back in him. That was unforgettable. I still have the x-ray underneath the guest bed, the vet gave it to me when we moved from NJ to NC.

Another one of the most memorable moments was when there was a fire at my apartment building. I had moved several apartments by this time. I was on my 3rd one since graduating from college. The building was pretty large, 4 floors but very wide across. The fire had ignited diagonally across the hall from our unit. Somewhere between 11:30pm-12am Sparky kept barking and I kept telling him to quiet down and go back to sleep. He never barked too much so this was very rare. I thought all the noise outside was just my loud neighbors. I needed to get to work the next day after all. Finally it dawned on me when I heard the word "FIRE!" I grabbed Sparky, his leash, my shoes, my purse and bolted out the door. There was no lights just a gush of thick black smoke that went straight up my nose and down my lungs. My poor little dog must have gotten his own fair share. As soon as a fireman saw us he grabbed me by the arm and quickly ushered us down the far stairs. We stood outside on the streets for hours upon hours that night. Finally the fire dept and Red Cross finally opened up the Cafeteria in the Somerset Hospital directly behind the parking lot. The Red Cross put up families in nearby hotels. They said they couldn't help me because I had Sparky. I heard later they did help some with pets but only as a last resort. I still hold a little grudge for that. Luckily I had a neighbor with a spare in-law suite we could crash for the night. The next night I could make my way to my parents or a friend's place. For the next 2 days he and I both coughed and had black soot coming out of our lungs and noses. As silly as it may seem I still remember Sparky as helping me get through that ordeal. I probably idealize him a bit but still I think he helped saved me. At the very least we lived through a fire together.

The building was condemned for 4 days, directly after we were only allowed to retrieve our things and leave immediately. I was very lucky having been so close to the unit. The fire I heard was from a cigarette or maybe even a candle that he had left burning when he went out. The man lost everything he owned including his only mode of transportation, a 10-speed bicycle.

Immediately after or around this time, my job offer came through in NC. I packed my smoke sodden belongings. My then boyfriend Nick flew up from NC to help drive my U-Haul, my mom drove down with me in my Jetta. That was Thanksgiving Weekend 2000.

...
...
Without Sparky I don't know exactly where I would be today. I know that is saying a lot for a simple dog. They say pets are like family and he truly is and will be. He was my first real pet that I ever cared for. We had a pair of white outdoor dogs in Korea but we had to leave them in less than a year and I was only in the 2nd grade. I vaguely recall their names, Kojak (m) and Lola (f) maybe? The only other would-be "pets" I had were maybe gold fish, beta fish, or the cats needed to help rid the pests. So Sparky is literally on the pedestal for all pets to come in my book. Sad but true.

Sparky as I best know is 15 years old. As I said I don't know his history so I don't know his birthday either. When I adopted him they said he was 4 1/2. That fell Jan 3. So I made up in my imagination his birthday would be June 3rd, silly and childish but what else did I have to go on?

My once salt and pepper Cocker Spaniel is now more white, brown from pee stains as he cannot control his bladder, blackish and very much gray. He is in a lot of pain. He soils himself daily. He cannot control his bladder, he either leaks or urinates in a puddle at least 1-5x's a day inside. He needs to be taken out every 2-3hrs but may still have an accident and always leaks. He's senile. He's on 4-6 medications daily - PPA, Rimadyl, Tramadol, Seliginine, Centrine, Simplicef. He tore the ligaments in both hind knees years ago. He can barely see, he has cataracts. He is going deaf.

I hate to sound like he has nothing going for him. He still eats well some of the time. Although he is on $prescription dog food$. He has good hips. He still has his ultra-sweet demeanor through all of this. He never barks or cries from the pain, when things are at its worst he whimpers. He refuses to ever give up.


...Fast Forward to 1 1/2 Weeks ago...
The vet gave us the last 2 medications as a last ditch effort with a mere 20-30% chance it would help him. One of the other vets in the practice doesn't even like to return my call. I know deep down because he agrees with my conclusion I had come to months ago but could not come to terms with.

When Sparky was still well and able, I always said when he is too much pain I will let him go. I didn't want to see a dog suffer. Now that I know the time has come, it seems to be too soon. In fact now that I know it is here I know I have been ignoring this for far too long. Where has the last 11 years gone? Many of us have struggled with our internal demons in one way or another. I have been through the depths of hell and back it is a miracle I am here and the life I have today. Sparky has been there with me and still loved me with big black eyes. When I treated him horribly he still loved me and now I should love him enough to say goodbye to him while he has some amount of doggy dignity. Now he looks at me with those very cloudy dark gray eyes and barely able to see and I know unwavering he still loves me. I know I will lose it when he still looks at me that way when he goes to sleep for the last time.

He may not be the brightest or smartest dog, far be it. Many of you have heard me say this "He's so dumb that he doesn't even know how to play fetch." Yet, for everything he lacks upstairs, he makes it up in his sweet demeanor. Always has.

My brother once told me that the Bible says there are animals in heaven so pets could go to heaven also. I am choosing to believe this because I have to, in order to help me get through this.

If you don't believe it, please do not correct my lack of theology or Biblical knowledge. At least not until we have mourned our loss. Thank you.